Lucius and the Pink Trailer
by killer-the-cat
Summary: Lucius is out of Azkaban and setting up house. This is R for a reason-don't read if you are too young! Don't read if you have a problem with gay relationships! Don't read if you don't have a sense of humor!-Okay warnings out of the way-please readrev.!
1. Lucius comes home to the trailer

Just a fun little fic that came from a dream. Thanks to Sally for her  
typing and inspiration.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this except for the plot.  
  
Warning: OOC, AU, and some slash pairings.  
  
Reviews are welcomed-flames are accepted, because I don't really give a rat's ass. (if you want to read my pride and joy-it's called The Godmother)  
  
Enjoy!  
  
Lucius and the Pink Trailer  
  
When Lucius left Azkaban, all he had in the world was his son Draco, and a paltry alimony from his ex-wife Narcissa. Upon Lucius' imprisonment, Narcissa decided she no longer wanted to be married to a convict. She divorced him and married the new young chaser of the Chudley Cannons, Marcus Flint. In the divorce settlement, Narcissa gained control of their marital assets (hence Lucius' paltry alimony) and ownership of Malfoy Manner. Though she is cold, Narcissa is not completely black hearted. She knew that Lucius would need some place to live after his release or escape (whichever came first), so she bought Lucius a pink trailer that was relatively cheap. She also secured a spot of land for the trailer to be parked on. This spot happened to be in the trailer park that Arthur Weasley won in a contest. Lucius resigned himself to living in his new pink trailer at Weasley Trailer Park. After he was released, he made a stop at St. Mungo's to visit an old friend.  
Lucius had many new experiences in Azkaban. One that he quite enjoyed happened on his third day when he accidentally dropped the soap during his shower. From that day forward, Lucius would often drop his soap, and assist others in picking theirs up. When Lucius went to St. Mungo's to visit his former Slytherin friend, Gilderoy Lockheart, he ran the idea of them living together past him.  
  
The conversation went like this:  
  
Lucius: So I thought that I would spring you out of here, and we could live together. What do you think?  
  
Gilderoy: Who are you again?  
  
Lucius: Lucius Malfoy. We were old schoolmates together, back in the day.  
  
Gilderoy: Uh huh. And who am I?  
  
Lucius: Gilderoy Lockheart. Wizard and first class mental case.  
  
Gilderoy: Oh. Ok. And you want me to move in with you?  
  
Lucius: Yes.  
  
Gilderoy: And you say I enjoy the company of men over women?  
  
Lucius: (nodding enthusiastically) Oh, most definitely. And you've told me on more than one occasion that you prefer giving to receiving.  
  
Gilderoy: (shrugs) Ok. If you say so. Let's go.  
  
So the two lived quite happily in their trailer. Lucius only has to bring out his pimp cane once in a while to keep Gilderoy in line and their slum lord, Arthur Weasley, only bothers them when they're late on the rent. They are now preparing for the summer holidays. Since Narcissa and Marcus recently married, they are going away for the summer. Draco will be spending his holidays at the pink trailer. Tensions are now running high at the pink trailer in preparation for Draco's visit. Gilderoy has been tidying up the trailer (in the French maid outfit that Lucius makes him wear) and Lucius has been mulling over the idea of pimping Draco out for more household income.  
Draco approaches the Weasley Trailer Park. Arthur and Ron come out to greet the boy.  
  
"Weasleys," Draco spat.  
  
"Now, now, boy. I'd be a little bit nicer if I were you. Anytime I like, I can throw Daddy Malfoy out on his arse," Arthur says (he now has quite a bit more confidence, due to winning the trailer park, and the wonderful pimp hat he now wears).  
  
"Yes Sir," Draco says, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Which way to my Father's trailer?"  
  
"It's the pink one in the back," Arthur replies.  
  
Ron eyes Draco interestedly over his father's shoulder. He has never been so near the hot blonde during summer before. As Draco walks away, Ron thinks, 'Now I get to see him in his swimming trunks. Oh Merlin! I hope he wears Speedos.'  
  
Draco approached the pink trailer, just as Gilderoy leapt out in his French maid outfit.  
  
"Drakie-pooh!" Gilderoy shouted (in the manner of Pansy Parkinson).  
  
Lucius followed him out of the trailer wearing muggle jeans and a wife- beater, wielding his Pimp cane. "Gilderoy, get back in here now!"  
  
Draco shook his head. It's going to be one long summer.  
  
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So reviewers should this be a one shot fic or should I make more chapters? 


	2. Draco comes to visit

Lucius and the Pink Trailer  
  
Chapter 2  
  
Draco walked into the trailer followed by Gilderoy. Draco angrily dropped his bags and turned around.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Draco asked Gilderoy.  
  
Gilderoy began to open his mouth to explain when he was cut off by Draco.  
  
"Never mind, the rumors at Hogwarts must have been true about the two of you shaking up together. Owww!" Draco screeched before rounding on his father who had just whacked him on the head with his pimp cane. "Merlin, that hurt! Whaddya do that for?  
  
Lucius stuck his nose in the air. "I prefer the term 'living together'." He wriggled his nose, "Shacking up seems so trashy."  
  
Draco sized up his father from his bare feet to his newly shone shoulder length hair. "Yes, I can see that nothing about you shouts trashy," he said sarcastically.  
  
This earned him another whack on the head with the pimp cane.  
  
"Ow, sorry." Draco turned to Gilderoy, "Why are you wearing that?"  
  
Gilderoy looked down, "Oh yes....hmmmmm, why was I wearing this. Oh, right. Well I was cleaning and your father says that I clean best when I am in this outfit. He also says that when I am in this outfit I give the best blow-"  
  
*!Whack!*  
  
"That's enough information. Thanks." Draco said walking around the cramped living room. He kicked a crushed beer can. "Why would anyone even try to clean this muggle hovel?" This time he managed to hide behind Lucius who in turn took the full brunt of the cane.  
  
"Sweetie, I'm sorry. That wasn't meant for you," Lucius said stroking Gilderoy's hand. He looked past him to glare at Draco. "He can't afford to take any unnecessary hits like that."  
  
"Hmmm?" Gilderoy said a blank smile on his face.  
  
"Nothing dear. Why don't you show son to his room." Lucius said, shaking his head.  
  
Gilderoy picked up his feather duster and led Draco by the shoulder to the back of the trailer.  
  
Lucius scratched his belly, burped, and reached into the refrigerator for another beer.  
  
Draco shrugged Gilderoy's arm off of his shoulder.  
  
Gilderoy opened the door to Draco's bedroom.  
  
Draco looked into the pathetically small area and for the first time in his life, he was speechless. The bed and dresser barely fit into the tiny room.  
  
"Your father wanted you to have the big bedroom. Do you like it?"  
  
Draco just stood there numbly.  
  
Gilderoy jumped onto the bed. "What shall we do now?"  
  
"I'm going to change. Is there any place to go swimming?"  
  
"Yes, there is a lake near the back of the park. Ummm, can I watch you change?"  
  
"No get out of here." Draco pushed him out of the room and slammed the door.  
  
I would like to thank all my reviewers and I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter. Please review if you read and all flames will be used to burn my enemy's house down. 


	3. To Pimp or Not to PimpThat is the Questi...

Gilderoy went back out to the living room and found Lucius sitting in his favorite armchair. Actually it was their only armchair. It was pink with whit daises and covered with burn marks. Someone in the trailer park had mistakenly put it in the trash. Lucius was clutching a beer in his right hand and the remote controller in his left. Channels flipped on the tele until a tractor pull came on the screen.  
  
"Ah, quality tele," Lucius said putting down the remote control and resting his hand between his stomach and the waistband of his jeans.  
  
Gilderoy sat on the arm of the chair next to him.  
  
"Drakie is such a good looking boy," Gilderoy said as he sighed deeply.  
  
"Yes," Lucius responded, "takes after his father."  
  
Gilderoy looked confused, "But he doesn't look anything like Severus."  
  
Lucius gave him a look of contempt and rapped Gilderoy lightly on his skull. "I'm his father you twit. What, did you actually think that I was his mother?" he asked incredulously. "There is no such thing as male pregnancy. It is a myth. Trust me, Severus and I tried for years."  
  
"Oh Merlin! Not you and Professor Snape too!" A voice from behind them said.  
  
  
  
Draco was standing behind them in his green swimming shorts and a towel thrown carelessly over his shoulder.  
  
Lucius took an appraising look at his son and rubbed his chin. 'Yes,' he thought to himself, 'Draco would make us some good money if I can convince him to whore himself.'  
  
Draco just shook his head after receiving no response and stalked out of the trailer.  
  
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~   
  
As he saw Draco step out of the trailer, Ron Weasley almost fell out of his perch high up in the tree next to the pink trailer. He raised his binoculars back to his eyes and watched as the half naked blond walk around until he found the swimming hole.  
  
Ron gasped. This was his chance. He broke several limbs of the tree (and nearly a couple of his own) in his haste to get out of the tree and follow Draco.  
  
He hid behind a bush and stripped to his birthday suit. He watched while Draco tested the water with his toes and finally waded in.  
  
Ron grinned widely and stepped away from the bushes.  
  
"Well if it isn't the Slytherin Ferret."   
  
_----_----_----_----_----_  
  
I just want to thank all my reviewers! *hugs*-Chapter four to come in a couple of weeks! 


	4. The Answer is to Pimp!

"Well if it isn't the Slytherin Ferret"  
  
Draco heard Ron's voice and was about to make a scathing reply, but when he turned around and saw Ron in all his glory, all he could do was gulp hard. He looked at Ron's erect penis and thought to himself, 'well if I'm going to be in trash city I might as well enjoy myself. My ass hasn't had any pleasure since I stole Pansy's vibrator months ago.' With the famous Malfoy smirk, Draco gestured to the water and said, "Come on in Weasel. The water is perfect."  
  
Ron grinned and jumped in. He re-emerged from the water shivering. He splashed Draco before swimming to the shallow end, "You prat, it's freezing."  
  
Draco laughed and swam closer to Ron. Now in only waist deep water, both boy were getting an eye full of each other. "Well let me help you warm up," he said wrapping his arms around Ron and moving his thigh to rub against Ron's cock.  
  
Ron could hardly believe his luck. His penis began to grow hard once more, now having recovered from the shock of the cold water. His rampant teenage hormones and urgent desire took over once more. "Oh, no you don't Malfoy. My dad's trailer park, so I am in charge," Ron growled as he smacked Draco's ass. "First we have to rid you of these blasted swimming shorts." Ron ducked under the water and quickly removed Draco's bothersome trunks.  
  
Draco gasped at the shock of Ron taking charge. He shrugged it off and thought, 'When in Rome....er Weasley Trailer Park.'  
  
Ron came back up and kissed Draco hard on the lips. His tongue probed hard at the blonde's mouth insisting upon immediate entry. Draco eagerly reciprocated and opened his mouth wide to accommodate the snake like tongue. Ron pulled away for a second and Draco's eyes glazed over with lust when the redhead thrust his fingers in and out of Draco's mouth. He quickly replaced his fingers with his tongue once again. Ron's hands moved to Draco's ass, where one hand kneaded an ass cheek, while the other hand remained situated at Draco's butt crack running a finger back and forth in it's search for the boy's opening. Upon finding the opening, Ron pushed two fingers inside roughly, making Draco cry out in surprise and pain.  
  
"I want this. Swim to shore and bend over," Ron snarled.  
  
Draco thought to himself, 'Salazar, he is a dirty boy,' but he swam to shore and bent over in compliance. Ron kneeled and poised his engorged cock near Draco's opening. Right before he entered the blond, he heard a rumbling voice.  
  
"You'll have to pay a mighty price for a piece of that ass ," the voice boomed out. 


	5. But at What Price?

The Pink Trailer Chapter 5  
  
"You'll have to pay a mighty price for a piece of that ass."  
  
Ron started at the resonating sound of Lucius' deep voice and fell onto the grass.  
  
Draco squeaked and ran into a nearby bush for cover.  
  
Ron gazed at Draco's magnificent retreating backside before turning back to Lucius, "So how much?"  
  
Lucius grinned like the cat that had just ate the canary, "Well let's see...."  
  
"What?" came the girl-like screech from the bush. "I am not for sale."  
  
"Shush Draco, Help Daddy out by earning some beer money," Lucius said before returning his attention to Ron. "I think a galleon for the day should cover it."  
  
"A galleon?" screamed the bush again, "I'm worth more than a galleon."  
  
Ron chuckled before finding his clothes and pulling a galleon out of the pocket, "Sounds fair to me."  
  
He was about to hand the coin to Lucius when a voice stopped him.  
  
"Not so fast Ron." Out of the woods stepped Harry Potter.  
  
Draco sighed in relief. "Help me Potter!"  
  
Harry raised his eyebrows and spoke to Lucius, "How much for a month?"  
  
Draco's head popped up from the bush and said, "WHAT?!?" just as Ron screamed the same thing.  
  
"Oh Ron, calm down. As we speak you have a naked Blaise Zabini handcuffed to the headboard on your bed. Do you really think that you need two hot Slytherins?" Harry asked calmly as he studied his soon to be whore.  
  
"I wanted them to play together," Ron pouted.  
  
"Wait a minute. What is Blaise doing in your bed?" Draco asked Ron.  
  
"Well your father sold him to me for the week."  
  
"You sold Blaise? You are pimping him too?"  
  
"Well of course. How do you think I was able to afford the hot tub?"  
  
"Hot tub? Oh is that what the barrel full of rainwater is in the backyard?" Draco asked sarcastically. Much to his surprise Lucius simply nodded.  
  
Harry rolled his eyes impatiently, "So how much Pimp Daddy Lulu?"  
  
Lucius' greedy head began calculating, "Let's see, one galleon a day, thirty days in a month......50 galleons."  
  
"But sweetheart, would one galleon times thirty days equal twenty galleons?" Gilderoy asked as he approached the group.  
  
All three boys' mouths dropped at the sight of Gilderoy who had changed into a black tube top and a short, red vinyl skirt.  
  
"Merlin Lucius," Harry asked in amazement after wiping the drool from his mouth. "How much for Lockhart too?"  
  
Lucius sniffed in disgust, "He is not for sale."  
  
Gilderoy beamed with pride at being Lucius' bitch.  
  
Harry hid his disappointment and dug in his moneybag for fifty galleons, which he handed to Lucius.  
  
Lucius counted the money while frothing at the thought of all the forty ounces he could buy. He smirked, "Okay he is all yours."  
  
Draco sputtered furiously while Harry began to drag him by the arm.  
  
"Wait a minute. I have to get my clothes at least."  
  
Harry raised an eyebrow in amusement and chortled. "Clothes? You won't be needing any clothes."  
  
Before Draco could protest, Harry apparated them both to Grimmauld Place.  
  
Ron picked up his clothes and headed back to his bedroom captive.  
  
Lucius threw Gilderoy an appreciative look. "wanna go back to the trailer and play naughty school girl?" he asked waggling his eyebrows.  
  
Gilderoy giggled and skipped back to the trailer with Lucius in tow. 


End file.
